Friends? Friends my FOOT

So much for getting psyched la... All bullshit. BULLSHIT. No more ChinaBlack celebration for me. I feel so fucked up miserable now. One by one telling me, 'seems like nobody's going leh.. If nobody go, I think I'm not going hor... Sorry har... Happy Bday.'

HAPPY BDAY MY FOOT. I mean, friends of 2yrs+? I'd say its time wasted. Of course, I still have some friends going (I'm changing it to KTV), but it was halved from the original lesser group that confirmed with me.

I'm gonna take those friends who turned up as real friends now; those are the ones who really cared about my bday and not the place/people. To think the ones who couldn't turn up were the ones I'd gotten closer to.

A couple of them haven't confirmed with me yet, but I know their answers are sure 'No's because ZZ and Derek are at Devil's... Vincent most prolly joining... So needless to say, the booze, the women, the club, the people etc won most of them over. I'm not angry over that.

I'm just saddened at the fact that an original group of 12+ people shrinked to about 6 due to 2 human factors: Vincent's uncertainty and the lack of Zhizhong's presence. This is MY bday, not just another outing, I thought I deserve more due respect. I was so worried in the afternoon that Vincent's not coming... Now I couldn't care less.

I hope to celebrate my bday with Shalyn tomorrow prolly with the icytongers (provided she's not celebrating today like I do), at least that'll make me happier, provided I woke up in the mood to go out. I might just shell up at home feeling all inferior about myself, dropping into that god-damned depression again.

Even if I don't get to taste my fav Martell later, I'm gonna freakin' drink myself drunk with freakin' beer at the freakin' family Ktv lounge at freakin' Shenton, celebrating my freakin' fucked up 19th Birthday. Cya!