Random note.

5 years of 感情 packed into 6 bags full, which are now scattered all over the room, untouched.



I don't know what to make of it.

Ahahaha.

Ahahhahahaha.. Night filled with Lunar club (New iRumours style club, officially opening on 25/09/07) till FashionBar till MOS; nonstop binging!

Like I told the girls... Fucking high baby! Hahahaha. We still have dance practice tomorrow at 2pm till 5, what the fuck! I'm gonna concuss!

Lunar was great anyway. The decor and atmosphere was awesome. Didn't know I would like a pub with chinese live band that much, but I did.

Let's get high again next week. It was fun! *muacks*

Damn!

I am watching "The Others" on the lappie, and I'd actually sat through almost 10mins of fireworks display beside my block!

It was the official launch of the AMK Hub... I had a perfect bird's eye view of it upon leaving my flat door but I mistook that din for the lion dance and performance stuff at the Central Stage, also just 100m away from my flat.

8 years of living in AMK Central, you'll learn to sleep past the noises from MRT trains, buses, lion dances, soccer fans on football nights, fights, and rowdy uncles when they're drunk.

I wish I did not miss the fireworks though :( The finale burst into a beautiful array of streaks across the night sky, just when I was taking my handphone out.

It was supposed to be a brand new start as from 20/09/07 for me, yet all I've done was throw up twice so far. I can feel the third one building...

Bugger this. It sucks to be me.

Other than the vomiting incident, at least the day so far has been simple, and nice. My mum coddled me like I was still a small child; Tucking me into bed last night, presenting me with a hot drink and a sandwich to pack off for work this morning.

It didn't feel any different from normal days though, just that I no longer have anyone to manja to, and someone that I can call immediately when I feel like sharing something. Someone to love and dote on.

But I've finally realised that I don't deserve this anymore...

No matter if sometime down the road we might get back together, or I get into a new relationship, I'm not going to be treated with disrespect anymore.

Yes, now I do understand that I deserve better, but only time will assist in making me believe so.

I understand you now. The love's all gone. Not when my presence made you uncomfortable. Not when you're so thoroughly enjoying your life now. Not when the presence of me in the past 5 years has been wiped clean. Not when your mum looked at me like I'm a squished bug that wasn't welcome.


Everything is too late. My love was brutally pulverised and dead now; And any semblance of our relationship is dilapidated.


For awhile, to love was all we could do
We were young and we knew
In our eyes were alive
Deep inside we knew our love was true
For awhile, we paid no mind to the past
We knew love would last
Every night, something right
Would invite us to begin the day

Something happened along the way
What used to be happy was sad
Something happened along the way
And yesterday was all we had

And, oh, after the love has gone
How could you lead me on
And not let me stay around ?
Oh, oh, oh, after the love has gone
What used to be right is wrong
Can love that’s lost be found ?

For awhile, to love each other with all
We would ever need
Love was strong for so long
Never knew that what was
Wrong, oh, baby, wasn’t right
We tried to find what we had
Till sadness was all we shared
We were scared
This affair would lead our love into

Something happened along the way
Yesterday was all we had
Something happened along the way
What used to be happy is sad
Something happened along the way
Yesterday was all we had
And, oh, after the love has gone
How could you lead me on
And not let me stay around ?
Oh, oh, oh, after the love has gone
What used to be right is wrong
Can love that’s lost be found ?

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, after the love has gone
What used to be right is wrong
Can love that’s lost be found ?

No more "Bei bei!", no more "Baobei I lub u", no more "Ba~by!", no more "kish kish?", no more tickle wrestlings on the bed before we sleep, no more "抱抱!" requests.

If I had known the way that this would end,
If I had read the last page first,
If I had had the strength to walk away,
If I had known how this would hurt,

I would've loved you anyway.
I'd do it all the same,
Not a second I would change,
Not a touch that I would trade.
Had I known my heart would break,
I would've loved you anyway.

It's bittersweet to look back now
At memories withered on the vine.
And just to hold you close to me
For a moment in time.

I would've loved you anyway.
I'd do it all the same,
Not a second I would change,
Not a touch that I would trade.
Had I known my heart would break,
I would've loved you anyway.

And even if I'd seen it coming,
You'd still have seen me running
Straight into your arms.

I would've loved you anyway.
I'd do it all the same,
Not a second I would change,
Not a touch that I would trade.
Had I known my heart would break,
I would've loved you anyway.
I would've loved you anyway.


It's only the next day, and I miss you terribly. However, now that I think of it, I'm honestly glad you're happy.

In a way, I'm relieved too. Our pain has finally come to an end...

Our memories are bittersweet, and I have yet to get over the shock of us being over, I still burst into tears uncontrollably, but I will move on without you.

You don't have to feel responsible for me anymore...

Thanks.

"The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive and do not forget." - Thomas Stephen Szasz

I forgive you. Do you forgive me too?

人在成长的过程中，难免遇到挫折。
懂得保护自己，也要懂得爱自己。
生命的乐章，看你自己如何去谱写。
躲避不一定躲得过
面对不一定最难受
得到不一定能长久
失去不一定不再有
转身不一定最软弱
别急着说别无选择
别以为世上只有对与错，
许多事情的答案都不止一个，
所以我们永远有路可以走。
你能找到理由难过，
也一定能找到快乐。
懂得放心的人找到轻松
懂得遗忘的人找到自由
懂得关怀的人找到朋友。

Forgetting is something that time takes care of, but forgiveness is an act of volition, and only the sufferer is qualified to make the decision.

Birthday wishes...

Mmm, alright, this year I'm going to do something slightly different. After seeing my friends put up wish lists, I'm going to do so too! (Not that I'll receive alot of gifts... Probably 5-6 at max)

Nonetheless, here's the really short list:


The gold Gucci cardholder, either the one with a cute bell, or the wallet type cardholder with a big ribbon... I've been eyeing them or ages. <3

Guess watch... The red one :)

LV coin pouch? *Slurps*

Or else, it can be Amway facial care products or anything you wish to buy me (but not all Amway products please... I kinda want to buy them myself, so I can earn the PV lol)

Anyway, I know they are expensive requests lol. Therefore I would love it too if you just wish me a sincere Happy Birthday on 3rd October (and now you know) and perhaps a birthday kiss? Kiss is only permissible for the ladies though =P



It's his birthday tomorrow... Hmm...

Whew!

Hey blogders, just a short post to say that I'm back =]

After the consecutive trip to KL with my colleagues, and then Bintan with Yan and William, I was working at NATAS fair over the last weekend. I'm glad its all over... I've never felt so old and lethargic before!

The pictures are all up on my Facebook, but I'm too lazy to post it here yet. Till then, take care :)


I want to feel passion, I want to feel pain.
I want to weep at the sound of your name.
Come make me laugh, come make me cry... Just make me feel alive.