Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Loving yourself.

Author's note: Ugh... I'm having an awful headache + giddy spell out of the blue. This sucks.

Yan was staying over again last night, partially to keep me company because I was feeling relatively down. (Other reasons being my place is nearer to her office, and we got used to seeing each other at least once every couple of days, lol.)

So anyway, Yan's curiousity was piqued when she saw me staring off into space in the general direction of my mac screen. She came over to look over my shoulder, and saw the message I'd just typed into my Twitter/Facebook.

"People always tell me my biggest problem is that I dont't love myself enough. But I've tried. I have really tried. The problem is, no one has ever set an example."

After reading it, she went quiet. For that few seconds, I willfully continued to stare at my screen, refusing to glance back for her reaction. "What for," I thought. "She's prolly just weary of my perpetual lack of self-confidence."

I heard sounds of clothes ruffling; She was probably taking out some sleeping clothes from my closet. Just when I was about to heave a sigh of relief that she was going to drop the issue, I heard her saying quietly in Mandarin:

"It's not that there is no one who loves you. It's just that you don't believe there are."

Christ... What a vicious cycle.

(Courtesy of my niece, Jasmine)

在如此哀伤的时刻, At such moments of sorrow,
她努力回想, She labours to recall;
试着完整背出, Trying to unerringly recite,
她年少时曾热爱过的.
一首诗。 A poem
That she once feverently loved when she was young. (line 4)

- Jimmy(几米)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wrong. I rmb saying
" It's not that u dun love urself enough, it's u dun believe there's someone out that will truely love u." But there are plenty out there, trust me ;)

Yan