Sometimes.

Sometimes I've wondered... What it would be like if I weren't bornt in Singapore, or if I were given the luxury of furthering my studies overseas.


Sometimes, I've also wondered what it would be like for me had I not encountered certain life-changing events.


Sometimes... Sometimes I gasped for air like I'd held my breath underwater for 5 seconds too long.


Sometimes I hated my instinct for self-survival.


Sometimes I hated myself for having such thoughts.



Trying to recall when I was contented, I would locate it circa 1997, and 2001 to early 2002. Au contraire, if you ask me to pinpoint when I became melancholy like this, I don't know.

Maybe it was always there.


I can't put my constant state of malaise to words. I dare not, for fear of letting out this maelstrom surging inside me and hurting everyone with its whipsplash.


I'd rather go into purgatory then get stuck in this limbo called Life.

This reminiscence of my 22 years of life left nothing but a bad taste in my mouth.



Let's just hope the good times will roll in again...

Cogito ergo sum... Adequatio intellectus et
rei.